Category: CAPP Blog

[vc_row padding_setting=”1″ desktop_padding=”padding-one”][vc_column width=”1/1″][vc_column_text]By Anne Peters, LMFT

It’s time we welcome 2021 with open arms and open hearts! It’s no secret 2020 has brought new worries and stress to us. The gift of a new year is a wonderful time for us to reflect on our own goals, passion, and motivation. I wanted to share with you a family tradition we started a few years ago. My mom came up with the idea for each of us to set an intention going into the new year. With that, a word to represent our intention. This can be done individually and/or as a family.

New Year’s resolutions are a wonderful concept – a way for us to set goals. Did you know more than 80% of New Year’s resolutions are not achieved? Here’s my challenge for you: Set an intention instead. If your goal is to get into better physical shape, set your intention for “perseverance.” If your goal is to make strong gains professionally, set your intention for “determination.” If your goal is to connect with your loved ones more frequently, set your intention for “family.” The options are nearly endless!

Once you’ve chosen your intention word, put it somewhere easily visible – on your bedside table, on your refrigerator, or on your mirror. In my family, we each get our word on a piece of jewelry to wear as a reminder of our intention. I noticed over the last couple of years, on days when I had an important work meeting or event I was anxious about, that would be the piece of jewelry I would reach for. It’s a piece that brings comfort.

I chose “self-care” as my intention word for 2020. Boy, I didn’t know just how fitting that would be! You’ve heard it here first: my intention word for 2021 is “soar.” I’m hoping to use my experiences and lessons from 2020 as a jumping off point into 2021 to soar – to build myself professionally, personally, and spiritually. It seems so fitting. I would love to know: What is your intention for 2021?

See a list below of different ideas for intentions from the MyIntent website to spark some ideas for you!

Happy New Year from all of us at LSI!

• Adventure
• Balance
• Be Kind
• Be Present
• Be Still
• Beautiful
• Believe
• Blessed
• Brave
• Breathe
• Compassion
• Confidence
• Courage
• Create
• Determined
• Enough/You are Enough
• Faith
• Family
• Fearless
• Focus
• God has a Plan
• Grace
• Grateful
• Grit
• Hakuna Matata
• Happiness
• Hope
• Inspire
• Integrity
• Joy
• Just Breathe
• Kindness
• Let Go
• Love
• Passion
• Patience
• Peace
• Persevere
• Purpose
• Resilient
• Serenity
• Strength
• Surrender
• Survivor
• Today
• Trust
• Unbreakable
• Unconditional
• Warrior
• Worthy
• You Got This

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[vc_row padding_setting=”1″ desktop_padding=”padding-one”][vc_column width=”1/1″][vc_column_text]By Anne Peters, LMFT

The holidays are officially upon us! This is a time of year that brings joy and merriment, but also tends to bring its fair share of stress. The holidays during 2020? Likely bringing more stress upon us as we figure out how to celebrate in a safe way during the pandemic. Here are a few tips and tricks, from us to you, to help manage that holiday stress.

– Challenge the idea of perfection – We often strive to have holiday traditions and gatherings be just right. Things will look different this year, and that is OK. Let’s lower the bar for ourselves and accept the holidays as they come.

– Focus on what is important – What is the reason you celebrate the holidays? Is it based in religion? Is it all about togetherness? It is about peace? Remind yourself what the reason for the holiday is, and make that your focus. The rest will fall into place.

– Do less – COVID-19 and its necessary safety precautions have given us all a great lesson in this one: to simply do less. Do what makes you happy! If it makes you grumpy to put tinsel on the tree, skip it this year. If you want to buy a pre-cooked meal, go for it. This year, we can grant ourselves the opportunity to simply do less.

– Use technology – For many, holiday get-togethers will look very different for safety reasons. We are blessed with technology to be able to put us in the same room (virtually) with our loved ones. Plan some fun virtual events with your family – a cookie-baking day, a movie-watching virtual party, or some fun holiday karaoke.

– Take a walk – Let’s face it, it’s cold in Iowa in December. Walking does wonders for our mind and body though, so bundle up and get out for a walk. Try to be mindful on this walk, notice the holiday decorations and the crisp air.

Ultimately, it comes down to offering ourselves grace. Do what makes you feel good and celebrate the holidays in whatever way feels best to you. We are all in this together. Happy Holidays from all of us at LSI to you and yours![/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]

[vc_row padding_setting=”1″ desktop_padding=”padding-one”][vc_column width=”1/1″][vc_column_text]By Anne Peters, LMFT

Thanksgiving has come and gone, but our gratitude lasts all year long. How do we foster gratitude in our children? How can we teach them empathy? Here are some great ideas:

1. Empathize with your children – Model for them what it’s like to show empathy. As an example, if a child in your care is feeling scared of a storm, we can empathize by saying, “I see that you are feeling scared, and I understand your scared feelings. Storms can be loud and startle us. We are safe.”

2. Talk about others’ feelings – Acknowledge and label when those around your child are experiencing feelings – both positive and negative. For example, if you notice a child at the park is crying, talk with your child about how that person is feeling. This expands a child’s understanding of feelings for both themselves and others.

3. Show empathy as a team – If a child at the park trips and falls, team up with your child to go check on the friend and offer empathy.

4. Read stories about feelings – The more all feelings are normalized, the more comfortable a child will feel to be aware of their own (and others’) feelings. Some of my favorite feelings books? “Grumpy Monkey” and “Today I Feel Silly.”

5. Be a role model – If this has not been made clear yet, the easiest and most effective way for a child to learn empathy and gratitude is by YOUR example! They are always observing us and learning along the way.

6. Be patient – Growing the skill of empathy takes time and does not happen overnight. Be patient, and the skills will develop. Especially true for children who have experienced trauma, this skill may take time but we can all agree it is worth it in the end.

I hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving, despite the differences 2020 has brought us. We are thankful for you![/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]

[vc_row padding_setting=”1″ desktop_padding=”padding-one”][vc_column width=”1/1″][vc_column_text]By Anne Peters, LMFT

It’s finally that time of year – the holidays. Thanksgiving is fast approaching, then it’s full steam ahead to celebrate our favorite winter holidays. The holiday season can bring so much joy, but it can also bring its fair share of stress and anxiety. This year is no different. In fact, we may be experiencing even more stress and anxiety as we tackle our first holiday season during the COVID-19 pandemic. It’s a lot to handle, but know you are not handling it alone! Here’s a great activity you can practice when you start to feel overwhelmed during this holiday season. It’s a gratitude mindfulness activity shared from the book “The Gratitude Jar” by Josie Robinson. Teach this to your teenagers, partners, and family members, and extend some gratitude and peace. Enjoy!

Gratitude Mindfulness

This is a great meditation to do at the beginning of the day, or very end. Turn off your phone and free yourself of interruptions. Either sit or lie down, whatever is most comfortable. Now close your eyes.

Take a long, slow, deep breath in and slowly exhale. Feel any tension melting away as you gradually relax deeper with each breath. Take another long, slow, deep breath in and exhale. Feel yourself drifting into a state of deep relaxation.

Continue to breathe slowly and gently as you bring your awareness to the top of your head. Picture a warm, loving, golden light spreading from the top of your head down to your toes. Feel your muscles relax as the light washes over you, surrounding and protecting you. Take a few more deep breaths and relax deeply. In this safe, relaxed state, reflect on all the things you’re grateful for: loved ones, breath in your lungs, sunshine, fresh air, the tasty dinner you had that evening, a nice compliment from a coworker – whatever comes to mind.

As each gratitude appears, visualize yourself saying the words “thank you” to each. Picture the person you’re grateful for standing in front of you. Tell them how grateful you are for them and why. Try to make the image and feeling as real as you can. Taste the delicious apple you ate for lunch and say “thank you” to it. If you’re having a difficult time coming up with gratitudes, ask God, a higher power, or the highest part of yourself to reveal them to you.

Now, allow the feeling of deep gratitude to come into your body. Notice where in your body the feeling is. Take a few deep breaths and allow this feeling to expand. Enjoy the pleasant feeling gratitude gives you, and feel it washing away your tension and negativity. You can remain in this relaxed state as long as you like.

When you’re ready, end your gratitude meditation with the following affirmation: “Thank you for the many blessings I have been bestowed with. May these blessings multiply as I continue to notice and give thanks for them. Thank you, universe. Amen.”

Now, wiggle your toes and fingers, open your eyes, and give yourself a few moments to adjust. Bring that feeling of gratitude with you as you go through your day, or drift off to sleep.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]

[vc_row padding_setting=”1″ desktop_padding=”padding-one”][vc_column width=”1/1″][vc_column_text]By Anne Peters, LMFT

Does anyone else still feel like you are recovering from daylight saving time? It’s always a reminder to me of just how important and crucial sleep is. We also know 2020 has brought a lot of stress, and with stress comes sleep difficulty. Why is it important that we get an appropriate amount of sleep? The reasons are nearly endless, but here are some of the most critical.

• Improved immune system (less sick days!)
• Better sleep = better mood
• Improved memory
• Improved physical health (healthy heart, steadier blood sugar, maintained weight)
• Sharper mind

Now we know the benefits are tremendous, so how do we actually get the sleep we need? Here are some tips!

• Turn all electronics off at least an hour or two before you plan to close your eyes to sleep. Instead, read a book, talk with a friend or family member, or spend some time outside (if the weather allows).
• Keep the temperature cool.
• Reduce caffeine use later in the day.
• Try to sleep and wake at consistent times – even on weekends.
• Take a relaxing bath or shower to help relax before bed.
• Meditate and be mindful. This one has been proven to be most helpful for me, so I wanted to share my favorite mindfulness activity to use before bed. If you prefer to listen to a similar exercise, do an internet search for “Progressive Muscle Relation.” Here’s a great script from River Ridge Counseling you can read and practice to yourself and see just how calm it makes you. Enjoy a good night’s sleep!

Begin in a comfortable position sitting, standing, or lying down (this works for sleep preparation also). You can change positions any time during the progressive muscle relaxation exercises to make yourself more comfortable as needed.

1. The first progressive muscle relaxation exercise is breathing. Breathe in forcefully and deeply, and hold this breath. Hold it… hold it… and now release. Let all the air go out slowly, and release all the tension. Take another deep breath in. Hold it… and then exhale slowly, allowing the tension to leave your body with the air. Now breathe even more slowly and gently… breathe in… hold… out… breathe in… hold… out… Continue to breathe slowly and gently. Allow your breathing to relax you. Imagine with each exhale that the tension and stress is being released with the air. Let the tension out of your chest.

2. The next progressive muscle relaxation exercise focuses on relaxing the muscles of your body. Start with the large muscles of your legs. Tighten all the muscles of your legs. Tense the muscles further. Hold onto this tension. Feel how tight and tensed the muscles in your legs are right now. Squeeze the muscles harder, tighter… Continue to hold this tension. Feel the muscles wanting to give up this tension. Hold it for a few moments more… and now relax. Let all the tension go. Feel the muscles in your legs going limp, loose, and relaxed. Notice how relaxed the muscles feel now. Feel the difference between tension and relaxation. Enjoy the pleasant feeling of relaxation in your legs. Now focus on the muscles in your arms. Tighten your shoulders, upper arms, lower arms, and hands. Squeeze your hands into tight fists. Tense the muscles in your arms and hands as tightly as you can. Squeeze harder… harder… hold the tension in your arms, shoulders, and hands. Feel the tension in these muscles. Hold it for a few moments more… and now release. Let the muscles of your shoulders, arms, and hands relax and go limp. Feel the relaxation as your shoulders lower into a comfortable position and your hands relax at your sides. Allow the muscles in your arms to relax completely.

3. Focus again on your breathing. Slow, even, regular breaths. Breathe in relaxation… and breathe out tension… in relaxation… and out tension… Continue to breathe slowly and rhythmically.

4. Now focus on the muscles of your buttocks. Tighten these muscles as much as you can. Hold this tension… and then release. Relax your muscles. Tighten the muscles of your back now. Feel your back tightening, pulling your shoulders back and tensing the muscles along your spine. Arch your back slightly as you tighten these muscles. Hold… and relax. Let all the tension go. Feel your back comfortably relaxing into a good and healthy posture. Turn your attention now to the muscles of your chest and stomach. Tighten and tense these muscles. Tighten them further… hold this tension… and release. Relax the muscles of your trunk.

5. Finally, tighten the muscles of your face. Scrunch your eyes shut tightly, wrinkle your nose, and tighten your cheeks and chin. Hold this tension in your face… and relax. Release all the tension. Feel how relaxed your face is.

6. Notice all of the muscles in your body… notice how relaxed your muscles feel. Allow any last bits of tension to drain away. Enjoy the relaxation you are experiencing. Notice your calm breathing… your relaxed muscles… Enjoy the relaxation for a few moments.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]

[vc_row padding_setting=”1″ desktop_padding=”padding-one”][vc_column width=”1/1″][vc_column_text]By Anne Peters, LMFT

It’s no secret spending time with your family is important. How important is it? Spending time together as a family has been shown to decrease negative behaviors, improve academic functioning, improve confidence, and build a child’s positive character skills. Children learn from us, so if we model empathy, kindness, and compassion, our children will grow to be more empathetic, kind, and compassionate. What’s better than that?

Here are some great activities you can do with your family during this spooktacular time of year. Even better, these will be memories that last a lifetime!

1. Pumpkin patches and apple orchards – This is probably a predictable idea, but for good reason! They are decked out with family fun activities – from corn mazes to apple picking. The fun keeps going long after you get home, too. Carving or painting pumpkins is such a fun family activity and allows the kiddos to be as creative as they can. We would love to see pictures of your decorated pumpkins!

2. Halloween scavenger hunt – Get as creative as you want with this one. Set up clues around your house and encourage the children to find and follow the clues to the final surprise. I found a great pre-made Halloween scavenger hunt here, so all you need to do is print, hide the clues, and have fun!

3. Make a Halloween origami bookmark – This idea looks so fun! Depending on fine motor skills, this activity can be for children as young as kindergarteners. Follow the origami instructions to create an adorable vampire bookmark. There are so many options out there for different designs too, and I bet your children will ask to do this activity again and again!

4. Plan a Halloween movie marathon – Let’s set the scene: You and your family spend the day creating spooky decorations and making popcorn, then join together for a Halloween movie marathon. Choose age-appropriate movies and enjoy! My recommendations for the young tikes: “Spookly the Square Pumpkin.”

5. Go “Booing” – Random acts of kindness is the basis of this one. Put together a small gift for a friend or neighbor, set it on their doorstep, and run! It’s a great way to socially distance but still show our friends and neighbors we are thinking about them. You don’t need to spend money on this activity. You could always color pictures as a family, paint stones, or bake some cookies. It’s the thought that counts!

Fall is such a great time of year. Take your time to slow down and enjoy it with your family. Memories are ready to be made![/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]

[vc_row padding_setting=”1″ desktop_padding=”padding-one”][vc_column][vc_column_text]By Anne Peters, LMFT

Reading with your child is such a valuable experience. You can go on magical adventures together, learn something new with one another, and strengthen your relationship. Especially during difficult times, it can be helpful to read a book together that really connects with them. COVID-19 brings up a lot of questions and confusion for our children (and for us!). Here are some book recommendations from my library to yours![/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row][vc_row padding_setting=”1″ desktop_padding=”padding-one”][vc_column width=”1/4″][vc_single_image image=”26534″][/vc_column][vc_column width=”3/4″][vc_column_text]1. “Right Now, I am Fine” by D. Owen – This was one of my most recent book purchases, and I love it. It’s written by a child psychologist and it processes the feelings of anxiety and teaches some calming techniques in a super kid-friendly way.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row][vc_row padding_setting=”1″ desktop_padding=”padding-one”][vc_column width=”1/4″][vc_single_image image=”26536″][/vc_column][vc_column width=”3/4″][vc_column_text]2. “The Good Egg” by J. John and P. Oswald – These authors have also written “The Bad Seed” and “The Cool Bean,” which are also wonderful books. When we think about the time we are in now, “The Good Egg” is a fabulous book that teaches how to take care of ourselves under pressure and offer grace to those around us. Sounds fitting right now![/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row][vc_row padding_setting=”1″ desktop_padding=”padding-one”][vc_column width=”1/4″][vc_single_image image=”26537″][/vc_column][vc_column width=”3/4″][vc_column_text]3. “The Way I Feel” by J. Cain – This book is a tried and true classic for me in my therapy practice. When our brains get all mumble-jumbled during times of confusion or stress, it can be super helpful to just simply talk feelings. Here’s a tip while reading this book: After each new feeling page, encourage your child to identify something that makes them feel that way. This opens the line of communication and you can work together to understand some of those big feelings.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row][vc_row padding_setting=”1″ desktop_padding=”padding-one”][vc_column width=”1/4″][vc_single_image image=”26538″][/vc_column][vc_column width=”3/4″][vc_column_text]4. “Breathe Like a Bear” by K. Willey – This book includes 30 short mindfulness breathing techniques for children. It helps our children (and us) find the calm during the day.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row][vc_row padding_setting=”1″ desktop_padding=”padding-one”][vc_column width=”1/4″][vc_single_image image=”26539″][/vc_column][vc_column width=”3/4″][vc_column_text]5. “Don’t Feed the Worry Bug” by A. Green – This book does a phenomenal job of explaining anxiety in an age-appropriate way. This book is all about when we feed our worry bugs, they get bigger and bigger. It can help normalize anxiety for children, but then encourage them to recognize to not let the worries overtake the day.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row][vc_row padding_setting=”1″ desktop_padding=”padding-one”][vc_column][vc_column_text]Let us know what you think! What books have been your children’s favorites over the last several months? Share your ideas with April.Howe@LSIowa.org.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]

[vc_row padding_setting=”1″ desktop_padding=”padding-one”][vc_column width=”1/1″][vc_column_text]By Anne Peters, LMFT

It’s no secret that feelings of anxiety have increased for many of us over the last several months. There has been so much uncertainty in our world, and if there’s one thing uncertainty feeds, it’s anxiety. This is the same for children. Children are not always aware of what that feeling may be, so we need to know the signs that our children are feeling anxious so we can offer some support. These signs are great as a reference for yourself, too, if you don’t always fully know what emotions are running through you.

Sleep – When you notice an interruption in your child’s sleep, this could be a sign of anxiety. It can be hard for them (and us!) to turn off their brains enough to rest. Offer support at bedtime and reassure your child they are safe and healthy. A few extra cuddles will never hurt.

Moodiness – A change in mood can also be a sign of some worrying. If you notice the moodiness remains past what is typical for your child, sit your child down and ask what’s on their mind. Don’t dive in with addressing the moodiness. Be vulnerable with your child and process how things have been confusing and difficult lately, and open the gates of communication to get anything off their chest.

Reassurance Seeking – Maybe you’ve noticed your child asking more questions like “Am I going to be OK?” or “Are you going to get sick?” Their little minds are trying to make sense of what’s going on around them. Since we do not have complete knowledge that you, I, or anyone will not get sick, we don’t want to falsely assure them. We can, however, acknowledge the many things we do every day to help stay healthy (washing hands, wearing masks, social distancing, etc.).

Physical Symptoms – Most commonly, headaches and stomachaches can be somatic symptoms of anxiety. If you’ve noticed an increase in any physical symptoms, validate and reassure your child’s ailments, and take some time to do some coping skills together. Go for a walk, take some deep breaths, tell jokes, or draw!

Difficulty Separating – In the midst of hard feelings, a child is likely to want to spend extra time with the people who comfort them the most – you! If you notice your child is clingier, this may be the anxiety talking. Be there for your child, talk with them, and offer endless hugs.

Finally, if you are worried about the anxiety your child is experiencing and feel you need some more support, please contact us. LSI has a team of therapists ready to support you![/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]

[vc_row padding_setting=”1″ desktop_padding=”padding-one”][vc_column width=”1/1″][vc_column_text]By Anne Peters, LMFT

Happy September, everyone! We have officially made it through summer and we are all getting back into our school and work routine. Although this is a time of year when we fall into normal routines and a lot of predictability, this year feels a little bit different due to COVID-19. How can we manage the uncertainties for ourselves and our families?

First, let’s take a look at the definition of the word “uncertain.” It can be defined as “not known beyond doubt, not having certain knowledge, and not clearly defined.” All of those aspects feel pretty similar to what we are experiencing right now, right? As humans, we are motivated to reduce the feeling of uncertainty because it feels so uncomfortable for us. Scientific studies have shown that when we know something negative is coming, we experience less agitation and more of a sense of calm than when we are told there’s a 50% chance that same negative thing might happen. That uncertainty is difficult for us to manage. It’s an unnatural state of being for us and scientifically, it signals to the brain that things are not quite right. The brain then tries to fill in the blanks to resolve the uncertainty, which can lead to anxiety.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row][vc_row padding_setting=”1″ desktop_padding=”padding-one”][vc_column width=”1/4″][vc_single_image image=”26441″ img_size=”large”][/vc_column][vc_column width=”3/4″][vc_column_text]So, what do we do? It’s so important for us to teach our children how to separate the things we can control from the things that we cannot control, and to practice that ourselves. When we focus on the aspects of the situation that we can control, we switch from ineffective worrying to active problem solving. Take a look at this example from Clearview Social of a way to draw out and visualize the separation between the things you can and cannot control.

Beyond recognizing what you can and cannot control, setting a routine and structure is critical. It provides us with a sense of safety and security. I encourage you to include one calming moment in each day’s routine, whether it’s a walk around the block, watching nature, etc.

Finally, it’s important to recognize your own feelings and encourage your family to recognize theirs as well. This technique is named, according to Dr. Daniel Siegel of the UCLA School of Medicine, “Name It to Tame It.” When we are able to recognize our own feelings and put a name to them, it helps us make sense of the mixed-up thoughts in our head and put them in an order. The feelings will hopefully not feel as big and scary when we start to really understand what they are and why we feel that way.

If you notice the uncertainty of the situation is weighing on you or your family to the point it is impacting your day-to-day life, please reach out to us. We have therapists here at LSI ready to serve you via telehealth therapy. Remember, you are not alone. We are all in this together.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]

[vc_row padding_setting=”1″ desktop_padding=”padding-one”][vc_column width=”1/1″][vc_column_text]By Anne Peters, LMFT

It’s the start of a new school year! This year has looked pretty different than any other year, hasn’t it? You haven’t been to school since March, you and your family have been social distancing from others, you’ve been wearing a mask, and some of your activities were cancelled. That has brought up a lot of different feelings – sad, angry, worried, scared, confused. Did you know it’s OK to feel any feeling? Even the adults around you have felt those feelings too. When the feelings come, talk to a safe adult, journal, or draw about it. That helps!

I’m sure the feelings have continued to swirl with the start of school. Some of us are going back full-time, some part-time, and some will be learning at home. No matter where you will be learning, I hope you can feel the support of all the adults in your community and beyond. We know this school year feels different. We know it feels like you’re missing out on a lot. We continue to be proud of your strength and courage. You are the future, after all!

So think of this year as another way to show just how brave and kind you are. Be kind to those around you (even if they think about things differently), study hard, and do your part to stay healthy.

I wanted to share a short story with you. As we know, flowers grow with water, sunshine, and soil. However, I came across this amazing story of a flower that only blooms after extreme tragedy. A Baker’s Globe Mallow is a beautiful purple flower that only grows following a forest fire.

How does this relate to you? We are going through something really challenging now, but it is absolutely possible to thrive on the other end of a difficult situation. When you hear upsetting news about COVID-19, or when changes happen due to the virus, allow yourself to feel those feelings. But remember that this little purple flower made it out stronger. So will you.

Have a great school year![/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]